another bad sign...
I realized round about 6:30 PM yesterday that the only thing I had eaten all day was (were?) Resse's Pieces. An entire one pound bag... one handful at a time.
This is not good.
d.
Friday, February 27
doctor frigidaire...
The baby was awake every 45 minutes from 2:00 AM until 5:00 ish. At 5:00 I just decided... fuck it.. and got him up. At 7:00 I was making breakfast for the kids. I dropped an entire two-quart pitcher of apple juice on the floor. I screamed. I threw some things. Several things. My throat still kinda hurts... it was that kind of screaming.
When I pulled out the refrigerator to clean up the puddle of juice that had seeped underneath, I found two stray word-tiles from a long defunct “magnetic poetry kit” that had once graced the door. The two words hiding under the fridge were “blue... condition”.
Thanks for the diagnosis, Fridge. If I want your opinion, I’ll fucking ask you for it.
D.
The baby was awake every 45 minutes from 2:00 AM until 5:00 ish. At 5:00 I just decided... fuck it.. and got him up. At 7:00 I was making breakfast for the kids. I dropped an entire two-quart pitcher of apple juice on the floor. I screamed. I threw some things. Several things. My throat still kinda hurts... it was that kind of screaming.
When I pulled out the refrigerator to clean up the puddle of juice that had seeped underneath, I found two stray word-tiles from a long defunct “magnetic poetry kit” that had once graced the door. The two words hiding under the fridge were “blue... condition”.
Thanks for the diagnosis, Fridge. If I want your opinion, I’ll fucking ask you for it.
D.
Thursday, February 26
geek genes...
My daughter K. has become a bit of an astronomy buff. This irritates my wife, which of course makes me happy. Saturn is her favorite planet. My wife is bothered by the very fact that she even HAS a "favorite planet" at age 4. We were having a discussion the other day... she was pretending to be a "World Eater" that ate the Earth, and my wife said, "Oh no! Now we'll have to live on Saturn" and K. said "Well, we couldn't really stand on Saturn 'cuz it's made of GAS." But then she added, "Maybe we could live on the RINGS!" I told her that the rings weren't really solid either and that we'd fall right through, so she said, "Maybe we could live on one of Sat-rin's Moons" I suggested Titan, to which she replied - "Yeah, cuz that's the BIGGEST!"
My wife is pointing and mouthing the word "Geek!" behind her head.
Ha! Damned straight. Now if I can just teach her that it’s pronounced “Sat-URN”
D.
My daughter K. has become a bit of an astronomy buff. This irritates my wife, which of course makes me happy. Saturn is her favorite planet. My wife is bothered by the very fact that she even HAS a "favorite planet" at age 4. We were having a discussion the other day... she was pretending to be a "World Eater" that ate the Earth, and my wife said, "Oh no! Now we'll have to live on Saturn" and K. said "Well, we couldn't really stand on Saturn 'cuz it's made of GAS." But then she added, "Maybe we could live on the RINGS!" I told her that the rings weren't really solid either and that we'd fall right through, so she said, "Maybe we could live on one of Sat-rin's Moons" I suggested Titan, to which she replied - "Yeah, cuz that's the BIGGEST!"
My wife is pointing and mouthing the word "Geek!" behind her head.
Ha! Damned straight. Now if I can just teach her that it’s pronounced “Sat-URN”
D.
jesus christ...!
I would love to be able to turn on the radio or the TV or open a newspaper or fire up a web-magazine or blog at some point this week WITHOUT being subjected to a review of Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of the Christ”. Let me save you all the trouble. It’s really bloody and kinda creepy. If you’re really into Jesus it will make you cry, and if not it will just skeeve you out.
And no, I haven’t SEEN the movie, I’ve just read all the reviews and they all say the same thing. So let’s all just shut up about it and send Mel Gibson his check. He can spend it all on some nice new diamond-encrusted rosary beads to jerk off with, or whatever the hell fanatic Catholic whackjobs do with the 90% of their money that they don’t send to the Pope.
d.
I would love to be able to turn on the radio or the TV or open a newspaper or fire up a web-magazine or blog at some point this week WITHOUT being subjected to a review of Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of the Christ”. Let me save you all the trouble. It’s really bloody and kinda creepy. If you’re really into Jesus it will make you cry, and if not it will just skeeve you out.
And no, I haven’t SEEN the movie, I’ve just read all the reviews and they all say the same thing. So let’s all just shut up about it and send Mel Gibson his check. He can spend it all on some nice new diamond-encrusted rosary beads to jerk off with, or whatever the hell fanatic Catholic whackjobs do with the 90% of their money that they don’t send to the Pope.
d.
Wednesday, February 25
i used to at least care...
Here’s the thing. I don’t want to do anything anymore. I don’t want to work. I don’t want to prep for my classes. I sure as shit don’t want to GRADE for my classes. I barely even want to teach them. As a result, the quality of my three classes right now could be described as so-so, lame, and sucks. And the worst part is that I’m usually bothered by that.
Right now, I’m not.
I also don’t want to deal with the kids. I don’t want to go anywhere when Spring Break rolls around. I don’t want to think about this fucking play. I don’t want to respond to emails. I don’t want to get involved with this stupid science department and all the university politics. I don’t want to exercise. I don’t want to watch TV. I’m not even sure what I want to do instead.
Sleep, Read, Listen, Be still.
I feel like my brain is being asked for too much, and its response has just been to shut down.Am I depressed?? I’ve been fantasizing about just getting drunk... just for the hell of it. I don’t even drink. At all. Ever. I don’t even know what person I would become if I were to get drunk. But I’ve been harboring a nagging suspicion lately that it would be more fun to be him than it is to be me.
I’m gonna close my eyes now.
d.
Here’s the thing. I don’t want to do anything anymore. I don’t want to work. I don’t want to prep for my classes. I sure as shit don’t want to GRADE for my classes. I barely even want to teach them. As a result, the quality of my three classes right now could be described as so-so, lame, and sucks. And the worst part is that I’m usually bothered by that.
Right now, I’m not.
I also don’t want to deal with the kids. I don’t want to go anywhere when Spring Break rolls around. I don’t want to think about this fucking play. I don’t want to respond to emails. I don’t want to get involved with this stupid science department and all the university politics. I don’t want to exercise. I don’t want to watch TV. I’m not even sure what I want to do instead.
Sleep, Read, Listen, Be still.
I feel like my brain is being asked for too much, and its response has just been to shut down.Am I depressed?? I’ve been fantasizing about just getting drunk... just for the hell of it. I don’t even drink. At all. Ever. I don’t even know what person I would become if I were to get drunk. But I’ve been harboring a nagging suspicion lately that it would be more fun to be him than it is to be me.
I’m gonna close my eyes now.
d.
yet another brief political rant...
From today's AP wire...
Really? I doubt it. I think that any homosexual individual who voted for GW Bush is clearly capable of maintaining such a monumentally stupefying level of cognitive dissonance so as to render them fully prepared to support the legal denial of their own right to get married.
D.
From today's AP wire...
The Log Cabin Republicans, a gay GOP group, worried that Bush risks alienating the 1 million gays and lesbians who voted for him in 2000 by pushing for the constitutional amendment.
Really? I doubt it. I think that any homosexual individual who voted for GW Bush is clearly capable of maintaining such a monumentally stupefying level of cognitive dissonance so as to render them fully prepared to support the legal denial of their own right to get married.
D.
blah, blah, excellent, blah, blah, mature...
Instead of writing a weblog entry I spent pretty much the whole train ride this morning working on a letter of recommendation for a student who is transferring to another college. I hate writing those things. They always come out sounding so... generic. It’s as bad as writing the narrative grade reports at my Old School. One tired phrase from this column, one from that column, blah, blah... concluding comment. Yuck.
Anyway... Since I don’t have anything to post, I’ll post that
Zzzzzzzzzzzz....
d.
Instead of writing a weblog entry I spent pretty much the whole train ride this morning working on a letter of recommendation for a student who is transferring to another college. I hate writing those things. They always come out sounding so... generic. It’s as bad as writing the narrative grade reports at my Old School. One tired phrase from this column, one from that column, blah, blah... concluding comment. Yuck.
Anyway... Since I don’t have anything to post, I’ll post that
Letter of Recommendation
for (STUDENT)
I have known (STUDENT) for nearly a year now. She was a student of mine last semester in a course called (COURSE TITLE) The class was a small seminar-style science course for liberal arts students at (MY COLLEGE). The subject matter of the course was the history of Astronomy, with a focus on the history of our understanding of the universe and our place in it.
(STUDENT)’s work in the class was of consistently high quality. On all of her assignments – written papers, oral presentations, and exams – her grades were typically among the highest in the class. As a result, she earned a solid “A” in the course, with the second highest grade point total of the seventeen students in the class.
(STUDENT) stood out in that particular class as a student who was a frequent and thoughtful contributor to class discussions. She demonstrated a clear interest in the material and was quick to ask questions and make comments, both in-class and in one-on-one discussions with me outside of class. Her questions were often deep and insightful, and she was one of a small handful of students whose contributions helped take class discussions into greater depth, both scientifically speaking, and with regard to the historical and social issues addressed by the course.
(STUDENT) is an outstanding student, academically speaking. She is also mature, pleasant, outgoing, and a thoroughly likable young woman all around. For all of these reasons, I can enthusiastically and without reservation recommend her for admission into your program at (YOUR COLLEGE).
Sincerely,
Dr. Dave
Professor of Physics
Zzzzzzzzzzzz....
d.
Tuesday, February 24
Monday, February 23
winging it...
I had all planned out what I was going to do in my Modern Physics class today... we’re talking about Special Relativity, and I was going to talk about spacetime diagrams using an old PowerPoint of mine from way back. Well this morning on the train I decided to fire it up just to remind myself of the order of the slides, and it turns out it’s not on my laptop. Fuck... I thought I put all that crap on here, but I’m guessing it’s stuck on an old backup CD at home. Fuck.
So now I have about a half hour to dream up something to talk about this morning. I mean... I can still talk about spacetime, and draw some pictures on the board, but it won’t be the same. We can talk about simultaneity and paradoxes... maybe do E = mc2...
Bah. It’s not that I mind being unprepared, God knows... I just hate being unprepared when I THOUGHT I WAS prepared.
D.
I had all planned out what I was going to do in my Modern Physics class today... we’re talking about Special Relativity, and I was going to talk about spacetime diagrams using an old PowerPoint of mine from way back. Well this morning on the train I decided to fire it up just to remind myself of the order of the slides, and it turns out it’s not on my laptop. Fuck... I thought I put all that crap on here, but I’m guessing it’s stuck on an old backup CD at home. Fuck.
So now I have about a half hour to dream up something to talk about this morning. I mean... I can still talk about spacetime, and draw some pictures on the board, but it won’t be the same. We can talk about simultaneity and paradoxes... maybe do E = mc2...
Bah. It’s not that I mind being unprepared, God knows... I just hate being unprepared when I THOUGHT I WAS prepared.
D.
Sunday, February 22
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Saturday, February 21
pittance...
I realized the other day that I never posted an account of my meeting with the organization that is funding My Play, and the resulting pittance that they are offering us to write the thing. Well, maybe "pittance" is being unfair. But it turns out that the only thing that WASN'T open for negotiation at the meeting was the amount of the commission, which is for $2000. Apparently the "range" that they listed on the application is just so they can leave their options open. The largest commission they've EVER given was $5000... the "standard" is $2000. Which is fine, I suppose. But split 2 ways, it’s not much of an incentive to work too hard.
The good news is that the completion dates are ENTIRELY up to us. We can promise the first draft next week, or next month, or next year. So we need to do some thinking about a schedule. At the very latest, I'd want to finish the first draft by July 1, which is the date that I leave NY.
That's about it. The meeting was very short. They said that if the project winds up being very long term (and it's something we want to continue working on BEYOND the accepted final draft) that future "rewrite" commissions are also often available. She also said that EST does everything it can to get these commissioned plays "out there" to theatre companies across the country to be performed.
One little tidbit of info that was interesting. The selection team for the commissions is made up of the Foundation’s program officers, a couple of people from the theatre’s "creative team," and five outside scientists who read over all of the proposals. They told me said that every one of the independent scientists LOVED this particular proposal! (My reaction, which I did not tell her was... "Duh, of COURSE!")
Anyway, I’ll be receiving my check in April as part of a reception marking the opening of the annual Science Play festival. I hope I don’t have to rent a tux or anything.
D.
I realized the other day that I never posted an account of my meeting with the organization that is funding My Play, and the resulting pittance that they are offering us to write the thing. Well, maybe "pittance" is being unfair. But it turns out that the only thing that WASN'T open for negotiation at the meeting was the amount of the commission, which is for $2000. Apparently the "range" that they listed on the application is just so they can leave their options open. The largest commission they've EVER given was $5000... the "standard" is $2000. Which is fine, I suppose. But split 2 ways, it’s not much of an incentive to work too hard.
The good news is that the completion dates are ENTIRELY up to us. We can promise the first draft next week, or next month, or next year. So we need to do some thinking about a schedule. At the very latest, I'd want to finish the first draft by July 1, which is the date that I leave NY.
That's about it. The meeting was very short. They said that if the project winds up being very long term (and it's something we want to continue working on BEYOND the accepted final draft) that future "rewrite" commissions are also often available. She also said that EST does everything it can to get these commissioned plays "out there" to theatre companies across the country to be performed.
One little tidbit of info that was interesting. The selection team for the commissions is made up of the Foundation’s program officers, a couple of people from the theatre’s "creative team," and five outside scientists who read over all of the proposals. They told me said that every one of the independent scientists LOVED this particular proposal! (My reaction, which I did not tell her was... "Duh, of COURSE!")
Anyway, I’ll be receiving my check in April as part of a reception marking the opening of the annual Science Play festival. I hope I don’t have to rent a tux or anything.
D.
both ends...
Well, the projectile vomiting has been replaced by explosive diarrhea, so we spent a half hour around 4:00 AM changing the baby’s clothes and sheets and hosing down his bedroom... after all of which I was unable to go to sleep.
My wife said - “Remind me of all the good, fulfilling things about parenthood?” to which I replied... “Yeah, as soon as I discover one...”
d.
Well, the projectile vomiting has been replaced by explosive diarrhea, so we spent a half hour around 4:00 AM changing the baby’s clothes and sheets and hosing down his bedroom... after all of which I was unable to go to sleep.
My wife said - “Remind me of all the good, fulfilling things about parenthood?” to which I replied... “Yeah, as soon as I discover one...”
d.
Friday, February 20
the fab blur...
Well, we stood in line with about a million people at borders on Wednesday so that we could be *whisked* past Kyan, Carson, Ted, Thom, and Jai at about half the speed of sound. It wasn’t much of a book signing. When I went to a Douglas Coupland book signing in Manhattan, I got to chat with him for a minute or so about Macworld Expo, and the new G5’s, and his Powerbook, and he actually asked me my NAME before he signed my copies of Microserfs and Hey, Nostradamus. At this signing the Queer Eye lackeys just snatched your books from you beforehand... I didn’t even see the Fab Five guys sign them!
Anyway, as surreal and entertaining as it always is to see famous people in 3D, when it comes to book signings, I think I’ll stick to quirky Canadian authors over Big Time Gay TV Superstars Of The Moment.
D.
Supplemental Celebrity Note: While waiting in front of Borders with the rest of the mob I saw Candace Bergen. She was walking by shopping, and obviously trying to figure out what all the fuss was about. I should have yelled – “Look everybody! Over here! Someone who USED to be famous!!”
Well, we stood in line with about a million people at borders on Wednesday so that we could be *whisked* past Kyan, Carson, Ted, Thom, and Jai at about half the speed of sound. It wasn’t much of a book signing. When I went to a Douglas Coupland book signing in Manhattan, I got to chat with him for a minute or so about Macworld Expo, and the new G5’s, and his Powerbook, and he actually asked me my NAME before he signed my copies of Microserfs and Hey, Nostradamus. At this signing the Queer Eye lackeys just snatched your books from you beforehand... I didn’t even see the Fab Five guys sign them!
Anyway, as surreal and entertaining as it always is to see famous people in 3D, when it comes to book signings, I think I’ll stick to quirky Canadian authors over Big Time Gay TV Superstars Of The Moment.
D.
Supplemental Celebrity Note: While waiting in front of Borders with the rest of the mob I saw Candace Bergen. She was walking by shopping, and obviously trying to figure out what all the fuss was about. I should have yelled – “Look everybody! Over here! Someone who USED to be famous!!”
day 'off'...
The plan for today was that the wife would take the kids shopping and then to a birthday party whiel I enjoyed some time alone.
The reality of today is that the wife will be taking our daughter to the party while I stay home with the projectile-vomiting 1 year old.
I hate having Fridays off.
D.
The plan for today was that the wife would take the kids shopping and then to a birthday party whiel I enjoyed some time alone.
The reality of today is that the wife will be taking our daughter to the party while I stay home with the projectile-vomiting 1 year old.
I hate having Fridays off.
D.
Thursday, February 19
come on R2... we’re going...
(this is an old entry from my OD that I never got around to posting here)
I think I’ve mentioned my office space heater in an entry a long time ago... the one that trips the breaker in my office if I run it at the same time as my coffee maker. It’s one of those little desk heaters with a fan... basically a hair dryer in the shape of a cube. It can’t heat a room, but it feels nice if you point it right at you. I actually usually put in UNDER my desk – that way it fills up the space around my legs with toasty warm goodness. It’s no substitute for “real” heat, but it helps just enough.
So, the other day after I reset the circuit breaker and made my tea, I unplugged the coffee machine and plugged the heater back in, put it on the floor and sat back to write some emails while my legs basked in toasty warm goodness.
After a few minutes I feel my right foot vibrating...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
I look down and notice that my shoe is touching the space heater. Oops. I give it a little nudge away from my foot, and go back to writing. Write, write, write...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
Huh. Did I move my foot? I must have moved my foot. I’ll nudge the heater a little further out of the way.
Write, write... I feel it again, its little fan vibrating up against my shoe...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
Hmmm... I’m pretty sure I didn’t move my foot. What the hell? This time I give it a nudge and then watch it. I watch as the vibration from the fan sends it slowly but purposefully scuttling across the smooth tile floor, making a beeline right back towards my shoe.
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
How cute! It’s like a little warm, friendly robot who just wants to snuggle my foot. Or set my pants leg on fire, I’m not sure which. Anyway, no matter what way I kick it, it seems to vibrate its way right back to my foot. It’s my new robotic pet. As cuddly-warm as a kitty, and just about as obedient.
Hopefully I won’t come to work someday and find that it’s wandered off to find Obi-wan Kenobi.
“I don’t recall ever owning a space heater...”
D.
(this is an old entry from my OD that I never got around to posting here)
I think I’ve mentioned my office space heater in an entry a long time ago... the one that trips the breaker in my office if I run it at the same time as my coffee maker. It’s one of those little desk heaters with a fan... basically a hair dryer in the shape of a cube. It can’t heat a room, but it feels nice if you point it right at you. I actually usually put in UNDER my desk – that way it fills up the space around my legs with toasty warm goodness. It’s no substitute for “real” heat, but it helps just enough.
So, the other day after I reset the circuit breaker and made my tea, I unplugged the coffee machine and plugged the heater back in, put it on the floor and sat back to write some emails while my legs basked in toasty warm goodness.
After a few minutes I feel my right foot vibrating...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
I look down and notice that my shoe is touching the space heater. Oops. I give it a little nudge away from my foot, and go back to writing. Write, write, write...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
Huh. Did I move my foot? I must have moved my foot. I’ll nudge the heater a little further out of the way.
Write, write... I feel it again, its little fan vibrating up against my shoe...
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
Hmmm... I’m pretty sure I didn’t move my foot. What the hell? This time I give it a nudge and then watch it. I watch as the vibration from the fan sends it slowly but purposefully scuttling across the smooth tile floor, making a beeline right back towards my shoe.
brzrzrzrzrzzrzrzrzr...
How cute! It’s like a little warm, friendly robot who just wants to snuggle my foot. Or set my pants leg on fire, I’m not sure which. Anyway, no matter what way I kick it, it seems to vibrate its way right back to my foot. It’s my new robotic pet. As cuddly-warm as a kitty, and just about as obedient.
Hopefully I won’t come to work someday and find that it’s wandered off to find Obi-wan Kenobi.
“I don’t recall ever owning a space heater...”
D.
Wednesday, February 18
can we talk...?
I saw Joan Rivers the other night doing some kind of cameo on a lame sitcom my wife watches. What the hell? When did she have her face surgically replaced by a plastic Halloween mask? No part of her face moves when she talks... it’s like a ventriloquist’s dummy. What the hell is wrong with people in Hollywood nowadays that they think a having a Kabuki-Mannequin-Head is preferable to having a few wrinkles??
D.
I saw Joan Rivers the other night doing some kind of cameo on a lame sitcom my wife watches. What the hell? When did she have her face surgically replaced by a plastic Halloween mask? No part of her face moves when she talks... it’s like a ventriloquist’s dummy. What the hell is wrong with people in Hollywood nowadays that they think a having a Kabuki-Mannequin-Head is preferable to having a few wrinkles??
D.
on the rails...
The train before mine was delayed almost an hour, which delayed my train by... who knows... I took the “earlier” train, which was later than MY train was supposed to be... are you following any of this? Anyway, the train I’m on right now is smaller and insanely crowded, since it’s carrying extra passengers, and it changes in Queens, which means I’m gonna wind up standing for the last 15-20 minutes. I love being a commuter.
Anyway... that all sucks, but I can’t go on and on about it. I have to plan my afternoon class, because I’m spending my afternoon doing something ELSE. The wife is coming into the city with the kids so we can go to a book signing uptown by the “Fab Five” from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Which is great, but I do have a JOB to do here, which she doesn’t seem to recognize. That pisses me off a little. Plus part of me suspects that she just wants us to go in the hope that one of them will make fun of my hair.
D.
The train before mine was delayed almost an hour, which delayed my train by... who knows... I took the “earlier” train, which was later than MY train was supposed to be... are you following any of this? Anyway, the train I’m on right now is smaller and insanely crowded, since it’s carrying extra passengers, and it changes in Queens, which means I’m gonna wind up standing for the last 15-20 minutes. I love being a commuter.
Anyway... that all sucks, but I can’t go on and on about it. I have to plan my afternoon class, because I’m spending my afternoon doing something ELSE. The wife is coming into the city with the kids so we can go to a book signing uptown by the “Fab Five” from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Which is great, but I do have a JOB to do here, which she doesn’t seem to recognize. That pisses me off a little. Plus part of me suspects that she just wants us to go in the hope that one of them will make fun of my hair.
D.
Tuesday, February 17
flying high...
Have people caught this show “Airline” on A&E? It’s a kind of documentary-reality-commercial for Southwest, chronicling the trials and tribulations of airline counter personnel. It’s moderately entertaining. One constant of the show... every episode they have to tell somebody they can’t get on the plane because they are completely shitface drunk.
Is this really such a major problem at airports? If so, you’d think they’d reconsider the policy of having a fucking BAR right inside every fucking terminal!! People are routinely sitting around for hours and hours, their gate is 20 feet away from a bar and we are surprised when people turn up a little loopy when their flight delay is over? And just now I watched them follow a guy who had just been pulled off the airplane out to the parking lot and then proceed to film him driving away in his car! He’s too drunk to sit on a PLANE, but not too drunk to DRIVE a car??
This society has a seriously illogical and paradoxical relationship with alcohol. We let people drink as much as they want, wherever they want, but we make it illegal to DO anything once they are done. If you can’t drive, or fly, or even officially walk around in public while drunk... shouldn’t you only be able to drink inside your own house?
D.
Have people caught this show “Airline” on A&E? It’s a kind of documentary-reality-commercial for Southwest, chronicling the trials and tribulations of airline counter personnel. It’s moderately entertaining. One constant of the show... every episode they have to tell somebody they can’t get on the plane because they are completely shitface drunk.
Is this really such a major problem at airports? If so, you’d think they’d reconsider the policy of having a fucking BAR right inside every fucking terminal!! People are routinely sitting around for hours and hours, their gate is 20 feet away from a bar and we are surprised when people turn up a little loopy when their flight delay is over? And just now I watched them follow a guy who had just been pulled off the airplane out to the parking lot and then proceed to film him driving away in his car! He’s too drunk to sit on a PLANE, but not too drunk to DRIVE a car??
This society has a seriously illogical and paradoxical relationship with alcohol. We let people drink as much as they want, wherever they want, but we make it illegal to DO anything once they are done. If you can’t drive, or fly, or even officially walk around in public while drunk... shouldn’t you only be able to drink inside your own house?
D.
you can have it all... my empire of dirt...
I was listening to “Fresh Air” with Terry Gross on NPR today and there was a long piece on Johnny Cash and his later-day work. They played a bit of his cover of “Hurt” by Nine Inch Nails, and it was just... wrenching.
I know it’s a horribly hipsterish thing to do... and lord knows I’ve been giving it to the hipsters a lot lately... but I think I need to dig up some Johnny Cash music to throw on the iPod.
D.
I was listening to “Fresh Air” with Terry Gross on NPR today and there was a long piece on Johnny Cash and his later-day work. They played a bit of his cover of “Hurt” by Nine Inch Nails, and it was just... wrenching.
I know it’s a horribly hipsterish thing to do... and lord knows I’ve been giving it to the hipsters a lot lately... but I think I need to dig up some Johnny Cash music to throw on the iPod.
D.
Monday, February 16
girls from the commute, episode 1...
I set up this "photoblog" thingy, so I might as well do something with it. What better use than posting creepy, stalkery pictures of chicks on the train? The first victim, I will call “The Blonde From My Stop.” Two new pics on streets and trains.
Please tell me if this new feature is too terribly, terribly creepy.
D.
I set up this "photoblog" thingy, so I might as well do something with it. What better use than posting creepy, stalkery pictures of chicks on the train? The first victim, I will call “The Blonde From My Stop.” Two new pics on streets and trains.
Please tell me if this new feature is too terribly, terribly creepy.
D.
v-day recap...
The presents were lame. (I’m guilty too) The dinner was awesome. (I made Thai chicken.) The sex was creative and embellished but ultimately...eh. When the guy has to fake an orgasm, you know it’s just not happening. The perils of too much KY.
The night started out with this game my wife bought called “Strip Chocolate”. Sounds good in concept until you realize that there is absolutely nothing sexy about sitting around naked playing a board game, and about the last thing I enjoy is having food all over me.
Anyway... The Thai Chicken recipe was a keeper.
D.
The presents were lame. (I’m guilty too) The dinner was awesome. (I made Thai chicken.) The sex was creative and embellished but ultimately...eh. When the guy has to fake an orgasm, you know it’s just not happening. The perils of too much KY.
The night started out with this game my wife bought called “Strip Chocolate”. Sounds good in concept until you realize that there is absolutely nothing sexy about sitting around naked playing a board game, and about the last thing I enjoy is having food all over me.
Anyway... The Thai Chicken recipe was a keeper.
D.
Sunday, February 15
must be the ozone hole...
I caught a performance by Kylie Minogue on Letterman the other night. We Americans mostly know her via an ill-conceived cover of "The Locomotion" from the mid-80's, but apparently she's some kind of HUGE pop star down in Australia. Big sex-symbol too. After seeing her performance, all I can say is...
What the fuck is wrong with people in Australia??
Seriously. There are satellites nowadays, Australia. You can watch OUR TV shows instead of trying to pretend to have entertainment of your own. It's ok.
D.
I caught a performance by Kylie Minogue on Letterman the other night. We Americans mostly know her via an ill-conceived cover of "The Locomotion" from the mid-80's, but apparently she's some kind of HUGE pop star down in Australia. Big sex-symbol too. After seeing her performance, all I can say is...
What the fuck is wrong with people in Australia??
Seriously. There are satellites nowadays, Australia. You can watch OUR TV shows instead of trying to pretend to have entertainment of your own. It's ok.
D.
shut up, hipsters...
I picked up the Village Voice to thumb through the other day... and turned over to their annual music review section – the “Pazz and Jop” survey – because I had heard a little snippet about it on NPR that morning. Apparently they put this survey out every year right after the Grammy’s as if to say... “Ok, forget all that commercial crap – here is the REALLY good music that you SHOULD be listening to.”
And a couple of minutes after paging through these lists, I realized the following. The only thing I care less about than which Pop Artist whom I don’t like wins which award I don’t care about is which band I’ve never heard of some NYC hipsters think I SHOULD care about.
Fuck you, Village Voice, and your “Too Obscure For You” hipster music lists. I’ve got an iPod full of AC/DC, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.
D.
I picked up the Village Voice to thumb through the other day... and turned over to their annual music review section – the “Pazz and Jop” survey – because I had heard a little snippet about it on NPR that morning. Apparently they put this survey out every year right after the Grammy’s as if to say... “Ok, forget all that commercial crap – here is the REALLY good music that you SHOULD be listening to.”
And a couple of minutes after paging through these lists, I realized the following. The only thing I care less about than which Pop Artist whom I don’t like wins which award I don’t care about is which band I’ve never heard of some NYC hipsters think I SHOULD care about.
Fuck you, Village Voice, and your “Too Obscure For You” hipster music lists. I’ve got an iPod full of AC/DC, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.
D.
Saturday, February 14
celebrity spelling bee...
This is what television has come to, folks. Watching people who used to be famous... spelling... poorly... on television. With "J. Peterman" of Seinfeld fame doing the hosting, I might add.
This is what passes for "sweeps" programming on Fox. Very sad.
And yet we watched it with enthusiastic glee.
Who would have thought? Alice Cooper is actually a pretty good speller.
D.
This is what television has come to, folks. Watching people who used to be famous... spelling... poorly... on television. With "J. Peterman" of Seinfeld fame doing the hosting, I might add.
This is what passes for "sweeps" programming on Fox. Very sad.
And yet we watched it with enthusiastic glee.
Who would have thought? Alice Cooper is actually a pretty good speller.
D.
Friday, February 13
juice...
Keeping it brief out of necessity this morning. I left my laptop’s AC adaptor somewhere yesterday... either in my office or in a classroom. I hope. If I left it on the train or something, I’m totally screwed. I do NOT want to lay down $75 for a replacement. Anyway, my battery level is at 29% and falling. I guess I’m not showing a PowerPoint presentation in class today! I’ll just finish up this, put on my iPod and plan my class on PAPER for a change. Today’s astronomy lecture will be “chalk only”.
I’ll probably cut my lecture short to give me a little time to prep for my meeting before I have to head uptown. Wish me luck.
D.
Keeping it brief out of necessity this morning. I left my laptop’s AC adaptor somewhere yesterday... either in my office or in a classroom. I hope. If I left it on the train or something, I’m totally screwed. I do NOT want to lay down $75 for a replacement. Anyway, my battery level is at 29% and falling. I guess I’m not showing a PowerPoint presentation in class today! I’ll just finish up this, put on my iPod and plan my class on PAPER for a change. Today’s astronomy lecture will be “chalk only”.
I’ll probably cut my lecture short to give me a little time to prep for my meeting before I have to head uptown. Wish me luck.
D.
Wednesday, February 11
first things first...
I want to read some articles and columns I downloaded this morning... some favorite weblogs... comics... I d’l’ them before I leave so I can read them on the train... it’s like my daily paper. Then I want to do a few other things... organize some music on my iPod... rip some photos from my little camera. Then maybe a quick entry.
Oh, how I do hate it when somebody sits across from me on the train. Grrr.
D.
the play...
I headed into the Old School yesterday to have lunch with my “collaborator” on the play. It was a great meeting, I think I made a really good choice as far as picking someone to work with on this project. I think having a science guy and a lit guy working together... we’re going to produce something that would be really difficult for a single someone to produce. It was really amusing to me how effortlessly he could sit there and talk about “character” and “motivation” and “tone” and “audience” and “themes” and “levels”... with the same kind of ease I can talk about Copernicus and Galileo and epicycles and infinity and all the science geekery that underlies the PLOT of the play. And we can both understand what the other person is talking about... we’re just saying things that the other person would never think to say.
I had originally envisioned this project as - I write a first draft and then he helps me polish it. But I think it’s going to be MUCH more collaborative and cooperative and organic than that. So I’m excited about that. I’m a little nervous that I’ll lose “control”... y‘know? I really don’t play nice with others when it comes right down to it. I want my projects to be MY projects. Hopefully I’ll be able to put that little monster away for the duration of this one.
(What the fuck is that smell? Is somebody on this train eating a chicken pot pie??)
So on Thursday afternoon, I’ll be meeting with the program officers of the studio and the science foundation that is behind the grant. Then I’ll find out how much $$ we’re talking about, and what the timeline is for this project. I’m a little nervous. We could stand to make as much as $10,000 between the two of us. (Three of us if you count my wife, who is also listed on the project as an editor. That means we get more than half!) Anyway, my job at the meeting is to make us all sound very important and busy with so much work to do that we really shouldn’t be working on this little play, so you need to give us lots of money to make it worth our while. While at the same time sounding very honored and humbled by the offer of such a prestigious commission. This is not stuff I’m good at. I’m too honest. It will be very hard for me not to say – “Hey, the money really isn’t important to me, I just want this on my CV.” No, Dave...
D.
I want to read some articles and columns I downloaded this morning... some favorite weblogs... comics... I d’l’ them before I leave so I can read them on the train... it’s like my daily paper. Then I want to do a few other things... organize some music on my iPod... rip some photos from my little camera. Then maybe a quick entry.
Oh, how I do hate it when somebody sits across from me on the train. Grrr.
D.
the play...
I headed into the Old School yesterday to have lunch with my “collaborator” on the play. It was a great meeting, I think I made a really good choice as far as picking someone to work with on this project. I think having a science guy and a lit guy working together... we’re going to produce something that would be really difficult for a single someone to produce. It was really amusing to me how effortlessly he could sit there and talk about “character” and “motivation” and “tone” and “audience” and “themes” and “levels”... with the same kind of ease I can talk about Copernicus and Galileo and epicycles and infinity and all the science geekery that underlies the PLOT of the play. And we can both understand what the other person is talking about... we’re just saying things that the other person would never think to say.
I had originally envisioned this project as - I write a first draft and then he helps me polish it. But I think it’s going to be MUCH more collaborative and cooperative and organic than that. So I’m excited about that. I’m a little nervous that I’ll lose “control”... y‘know? I really don’t play nice with others when it comes right down to it. I want my projects to be MY projects. Hopefully I’ll be able to put that little monster away for the duration of this one.
(What the fuck is that smell? Is somebody on this train eating a chicken pot pie??)
So on Thursday afternoon, I’ll be meeting with the program officers of the studio and the science foundation that is behind the grant. Then I’ll find out how much $$ we’re talking about, and what the timeline is for this project. I’m a little nervous. We could stand to make as much as $10,000 between the two of us. (Three of us if you count my wife, who is also listed on the project as an editor. That means we get more than half!) Anyway, my job at the meeting is to make us all sound very important and busy with so much work to do that we really shouldn’t be working on this little play, so you need to give us lots of money to make it worth our while. While at the same time sounding very honored and humbled by the offer of such a prestigious commission. This is not stuff I’m good at. I’m too honest. It will be very hard for me not to say – “Hey, the money really isn’t important to me, I just want this on my CV.” No, Dave...
D.
Tuesday, February 10
spinning...
It’s amazing the slow clarity of thought that accompanies imminent death. I hit a major patch of “Black Ice” this morning on a deserted back road... started to skid, turned my wheel to compensate, and completely lost control... I wound up sliding about 100 feet backwards down the road. The whole time my brain is very calmly assessing the situation... ”Ok... I’m not spinning anymore... I’m just sliding...backwards... I’ll just hold the wheel still... I’m slowing down somewhat... I’ll just keep my foot on the brake... lightly... I am in the other lane... but there weren’t any cars coming the other way, so that should be ok... I’m going straight, which is good... I don’t remember seeing any big trees on my side of the road...”
Finally I stopped. It was only then that I flipped out.
The human brain is a weird place.
D.
It’s amazing the slow clarity of thought that accompanies imminent death. I hit a major patch of “Black Ice” this morning on a deserted back road... started to skid, turned my wheel to compensate, and completely lost control... I wound up sliding about 100 feet backwards down the road. The whole time my brain is very calmly assessing the situation... ”Ok... I’m not spinning anymore... I’m just sliding...backwards... I’ll just hold the wheel still... I’m slowing down somewhat... I’ll just keep my foot on the brake... lightly... I am in the other lane... but there weren’t any cars coming the other way, so that should be ok... I’m going straight, which is good... I don’t remember seeing any big trees on my side of the road...”
Finally I stopped. It was only then that I flipped out.
The human brain is a weird place.
D.
Monday, February 9
keeping it brief...
Unlike last night... after all that Grammy hoo-ha, I don’t feel much need to go on and on in my weblog this morning. I had an awful night. The 4 year old had a fever and was up pretty much all night. Throw the one year old in there, and nobody got much sleep.
I only have one rant for the morning... a little Post-Grammy note. When the hell did genuine “Rock” music become completely fucking irrelevant? It’s bad enough we’ve categorized music into little boxes... Pop, Rap, R&B, Country, Rock, Alternative, Heavy Metal... but then we swept all but two or three of the genres into the “Awarded Earlier in the Day” junkheap. There was what... ONE country award given out last night? What about Best Rock Album? Does anybody know that the Foo Fighters won a Grammy last night? Or Pink? Or the White Stripes? Or Metallica? Didn’t they used to give these awards out during the SHOW? Or at least do a quick video run-down in between a coupla commercials? The awards shows keep getting longer, and the number of awards handed out just keeps getting smaller. You know what? I for one actually CARED who won for best soundtrack. (Howard Shore for “Lord of the Rings” or Philip Glass for “The Hours”? For once, a real CHOICE!) You’d think that somewhere in a 3-and-a-half-hour telecast, they’d be able to find some time to hand out that little tidbit of information.
I could go on, but I’m tired and I want to close my eyes.
Howard Shore won for LoTR, by the way.
D.
Unlike last night... after all that Grammy hoo-ha, I don’t feel much need to go on and on in my weblog this morning. I had an awful night. The 4 year old had a fever and was up pretty much all night. Throw the one year old in there, and nobody got much sleep.
I only have one rant for the morning... a little Post-Grammy note. When the hell did genuine “Rock” music become completely fucking irrelevant? It’s bad enough we’ve categorized music into little boxes... Pop, Rap, R&B, Country, Rock, Alternative, Heavy Metal... but then we swept all but two or three of the genres into the “Awarded Earlier in the Day” junkheap. There was what... ONE country award given out last night? What about Best Rock Album? Does anybody know that the Foo Fighters won a Grammy last night? Or Pink? Or the White Stripes? Or Metallica? Didn’t they used to give these awards out during the SHOW? Or at least do a quick video run-down in between a coupla commercials? The awards shows keep getting longer, and the number of awards handed out just keeps getting smaller. You know what? I for one actually CARED who won for best soundtrack. (Howard Shore for “Lord of the Rings” or Philip Glass for “The Hours”? For once, a real CHOICE!) You’d think that somewhere in a 3-and-a-half-hour telecast, they’d be able to find some time to hand out that little tidbit of information.
I could go on, but I’m tired and I want to close my eyes.
Howard Shore won for LoTR, by the way.
D.
Sunday, February 8
the grammy’s – hour three...
10:10 – Samuel L. Jackson introduces “Earth, Wind, and Fire” with some kind of sermon on the power of “funk”. Funk may do a lot of things, but it sho’ don’t keep you from looking silly dancing around when you’re 55 years old.
10:16 - Robert Randolph... I think I saw him on Letterman once. He rocks the pedal steel, yo. So... was that all the Outkast we get? No “Hey, Ya”?? Weak.
10:17 – George Clinton and P-funk! No way. Do you think they let him dress like that at the nursing home??
10:22 – Oh wait, they’ve promised us more Outkast. Now I’m confused. That was half of Outkast rapping with Earth, Wind, and Fire... no? Maybe I heard wrong. Ok, ok... I admit it... I’m as white as Timberlake. I don’t fucking know. I just like that one song. But I have never, ever, shooken it like a Polaroid picture. Ok?
10:28 – Here are some words you never thought you’d hear... “In the house... it’s Snoop Dogg and Jason Alexander.” Britney Spears related comedy bit aside... is Snoop holding a personalized bejeweled goblet??
10:29 – Chick Corea and Foo Fighters. Please tell me Grohl isn’t taking this seriously. I’d be very disappointed if he ever took anything seriously. Now they are rocking... and Corea is noodling... and it doesn’t sound half bad. Ok... the solo was lame. Eh... ill-conceived, but not disastrous.
10:34 – Michael MacDonald... he’s presenting an award and singing as part of a “bit”. He still sounds exactly the same as when he was a Doobie Brother, but when I hear his voice, I just think of his various backup gigs. “P-e-e-e-g!” In the meantime Record of the Year goes to Coldplay for that song “Clocks” which for months I thought was by U2.
10:43 – Sarah McLaughlan... where did she come from? Did she have a new song this year that I missed? Could be... it’s pretty damned forgettable.
10:47 – “America’s Favorite Couple” is apparently Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne. Really?? Anyway... it’s time for Best “Rock” Performance. Dave’s prediction... it’s a crime if the Foo Fighters don’t get it. But no... it’s the dead-person-factor again... it goes to some Warren Zevon duet with Bruce Springsteen that I have never even fucking heard of. When the hell did Warren Zevon become some sort of musical icon? I always thought he was just the guy who sang “Werewolves of London”. I defy anyone to name another Warren Zevon song.
10:52 - Another commercial note, on yet another L’oreal commercial... I had to rewind that to see who those blue eyes belonged to. Natalie Imbruglia. Wow. Who knew? Are those real? Wow...
10:55 – Time to play, “Who died this year?” Barry White, Johnny and June Carter Cash, Johnny Paycheck, Robert Palmer, Warren Zevon are the only ones who ring major bells. Speaking of which... time for a Warren Zevon tribute.( ”Aaa-HOOOOO!) A bunch of people who played on his last album sing along with a video of him... Dwight Yokam, Jackson Browne, Billy Bob Thornton... but the voice that really cuts through is Emmylou Harris. Damn... she’s still got it. What a fucking voice.
11:00 – Ummm... isn’t this supposed to be over?
11:05 – I can guarantee you that no more than 10 people in that auditorium knows who Andy Williams is. And even fewer know who this “Pierre” is that he’s talking about.
11:07 – One more PLAA... And now “Song of the Year” which goes to the songwriter, of course. Whoa... look, it’s Richard Marx!! He apparently wrote that obnoxious tear-jerky “Dance With My Father” song for Luther Vandross. My money was on Linda Perry, the chick from “4 Non-Blondes” who I hear is single-handedly writing every hit song for every pop-chick out there. But instead, it goes to RICHARD MARX!! It’s 2004 and Richard Marx has just won a Grammy. Wow... “Hold on to the night” Richard.
11:14 – Some “Recording Academy” stiff is going on about supporting music education in the schools. But then he quickly switches to bitching about illegal downloading. Blah, blah... then he plays a completely nonsensical PSA where a teenaged girl downloads a song and it kills the music in a dance club. Huh?
11:16 – Still another L’oreal commercial... Did I mention how fine Beyoncé is? Oh... ok, never mind. I’ll make a different commercial comment... those Steve Madden ads where they Photoshop chicks until they look like “Bratz” dolls... those are just creepy.
11:23 – Time for Outkast to get funky while dressed like Indians. I don’t know what it is about that song... it’s just one of those *perfect* songs that falls from outer space sometimes. Now they’ve been joined by some kind of weird feathered marching band. Time to break it down. “Lend me some sugar... I am your neighbor!” Priceless. The crowd is still going wild when it’s time to announce the next PLAA.
11:28 – Album of the Year. I think that’s the end, right. Nominees? Missy Elliot, Evanescence, Outkast, Tittylake, White Stripes... and Outkast gets it for Speakerboxx/The Love Below. For once, I have no argument.
That’s it folks... the Grammy’s. Hope you enjoyed my recap. Time for bed. Peace, out...
Dr. Dave 3000
10:10 – Samuel L. Jackson introduces “Earth, Wind, and Fire” with some kind of sermon on the power of “funk”. Funk may do a lot of things, but it sho’ don’t keep you from looking silly dancing around when you’re 55 years old.
10:16 - Robert Randolph... I think I saw him on Letterman once. He rocks the pedal steel, yo. So... was that all the Outkast we get? No “Hey, Ya”?? Weak.
10:17 – George Clinton and P-funk! No way. Do you think they let him dress like that at the nursing home??
10:22 – Oh wait, they’ve promised us more Outkast. Now I’m confused. That was half of Outkast rapping with Earth, Wind, and Fire... no? Maybe I heard wrong. Ok, ok... I admit it... I’m as white as Timberlake. I don’t fucking know. I just like that one song. But I have never, ever, shooken it like a Polaroid picture. Ok?
10:28 – Here are some words you never thought you’d hear... “In the house... it’s Snoop Dogg and Jason Alexander.” Britney Spears related comedy bit aside... is Snoop holding a personalized bejeweled goblet??
10:29 – Chick Corea and Foo Fighters. Please tell me Grohl isn’t taking this seriously. I’d be very disappointed if he ever took anything seriously. Now they are rocking... and Corea is noodling... and it doesn’t sound half bad. Ok... the solo was lame. Eh... ill-conceived, but not disastrous.
10:34 – Michael MacDonald... he’s presenting an award and singing as part of a “bit”. He still sounds exactly the same as when he was a Doobie Brother, but when I hear his voice, I just think of his various backup gigs. “P-e-e-e-g!” In the meantime Record of the Year goes to Coldplay for that song “Clocks” which for months I thought was by U2.
10:43 – Sarah McLaughlan... where did she come from? Did she have a new song this year that I missed? Could be... it’s pretty damned forgettable.
10:47 – “America’s Favorite Couple” is apparently Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne. Really?? Anyway... it’s time for Best “Rock” Performance. Dave’s prediction... it’s a crime if the Foo Fighters don’t get it. But no... it’s the dead-person-factor again... it goes to some Warren Zevon duet with Bruce Springsteen that I have never even fucking heard of. When the hell did Warren Zevon become some sort of musical icon? I always thought he was just the guy who sang “Werewolves of London”. I defy anyone to name another Warren Zevon song.
10:52 - Another commercial note, on yet another L’oreal commercial... I had to rewind that to see who those blue eyes belonged to. Natalie Imbruglia. Wow. Who knew? Are those real? Wow...
10:55 – Time to play, “Who died this year?” Barry White, Johnny and June Carter Cash, Johnny Paycheck, Robert Palmer, Warren Zevon are the only ones who ring major bells. Speaking of which... time for a Warren Zevon tribute.( ”Aaa-HOOOOO!) A bunch of people who played on his last album sing along with a video of him... Dwight Yokam, Jackson Browne, Billy Bob Thornton... but the voice that really cuts through is Emmylou Harris. Damn... she’s still got it. What a fucking voice.
11:00 – Ummm... isn’t this supposed to be over?
11:05 – I can guarantee you that no more than 10 people in that auditorium knows who Andy Williams is. And even fewer know who this “Pierre” is that he’s talking about.
11:07 – One more PLAA... And now “Song of the Year” which goes to the songwriter, of course. Whoa... look, it’s Richard Marx!! He apparently wrote that obnoxious tear-jerky “Dance With My Father” song for Luther Vandross. My money was on Linda Perry, the chick from “4 Non-Blondes” who I hear is single-handedly writing every hit song for every pop-chick out there. But instead, it goes to RICHARD MARX!! It’s 2004 and Richard Marx has just won a Grammy. Wow... “Hold on to the night” Richard.
11:14 – Some “Recording Academy” stiff is going on about supporting music education in the schools. But then he quickly switches to bitching about illegal downloading. Blah, blah... then he plays a completely nonsensical PSA where a teenaged girl downloads a song and it kills the music in a dance club. Huh?
11:16 – Still another L’oreal commercial... Did I mention how fine Beyoncé is? Oh... ok, never mind. I’ll make a different commercial comment... those Steve Madden ads where they Photoshop chicks until they look like “Bratz” dolls... those are just creepy.
11:23 – Time for Outkast to get funky while dressed like Indians. I don’t know what it is about that song... it’s just one of those *perfect* songs that falls from outer space sometimes. Now they’ve been joined by some kind of weird feathered marching band. Time to break it down. “Lend me some sugar... I am your neighbor!” Priceless. The crowd is still going wild when it’s time to announce the next PLAA.
11:28 – Album of the Year. I think that’s the end, right. Nominees? Missy Elliot, Evanescence, Outkast, Tittylake, White Stripes... and Outkast gets it for Speakerboxx/The Love Below. For once, I have no argument.
That’s it folks... the Grammy’s. Hope you enjoyed my recap. Time for bed. Peace, out...
Dr. Dave 3000
the grammy’s – hour two...
9:12 - Oh, look... it’s Madonna!! Jennifer Aniston called... she wants her 2001 hairstyle back.
9:13 – Sting is singing “Roxanne”. Jeez... Steward Copeland... Andy Summers... I feel for you guys. Gordon really does need to be slapped. Especially for agreeing to this half-assed reggae-rap abomination. I just noticed that Sting is wearing a skirt. What the FUCK, dude? No more yoga for you.
9:16 – I had to rewind (I’m on the TiVo now) to find out who the Latino chick with no clothes on is. Paulina Rubio? That means less than nothing to me. Best Pop Female goes to Aguilera... no surprise probably, although I would have gone with Avril. Oh, look... Christina Aguilera is naked now... all is right with the world. She makes a lame Janet Jackson joke about her dress. Honey, it’s only cool to show skin if you can ACT cool about it.
9:24 – Who the FUCK dresses Sarah Jessica Parker??
9:25 - I count about 18 black people backing up Justin Timberlake, apparently trying to make him sound less white. A doomed mission, to be sure. Perhaps if we add a Hispanic guy playing the trumpet? Nope.
9:30 – Another Beatles tribute in which they drag out the widows. Yoko... you’ve been living in the US and London for like, 50 years. How the fuck can you still have a Japanese accent??
9:32 – Paul McCartney is such a wanker. Shut up, Paul... and put the guitar down.
9:40 – The Black Eyed Peas?? Whatever. Check out the string section. I want an electric cello shaped like a question mark. That’s cool. Is this what passes for “socially conscious hip-hop” during the off years between Wyclef Jean albums? Oh shit... is that Tittylake again? Get that white boy off the fucking stage for the umpteenth time.
9:45 – Yet another Perfunctory Lifetime Achievement Award (PLAA)... for pianist Van Cliburn... and yet another for Doc Watson. Nice how we devote a whole 45 seconds to each of those, huh? Female Country Vocal award? I’m pulling for Shania just so we’ll get see how slutted up she is, but of course the late June Carter Cash wins. Never mind that she sounds like my 80 year old uncles singing on that record, she’s dead, so she gets the award. Good enough.
9:53 – Cuba Gooding gives another PLAA to some old black lady who apparently sings children’s songs. Ok...?
9:54 – I couldn’t give a shit for R&B of any sort, but I will say this - Damn, Beyoncé is fine. Pretty bizarrely staged number... with the fake painting tableau and all. She really needs to stop yelling now.
9:59 – Sean Astin, Norah Jones, Two jazz PLAA’s, and the award for Best New Artist – Dave’s prediction, reluctantly is 50 Cent. The winner is? Evanescence. Really? Has anybody heard anything by them besides that Matrix song?? Whoa... 50 Cent just walked up on stage... what was that all about? He’s gonna pop a cap in their ass in the parking lot.
(continued...)
9:12 - Oh, look... it’s Madonna!! Jennifer Aniston called... she wants her 2001 hairstyle back.
9:13 – Sting is singing “Roxanne”. Jeez... Steward Copeland... Andy Summers... I feel for you guys. Gordon really does need to be slapped. Especially for agreeing to this half-assed reggae-rap abomination. I just noticed that Sting is wearing a skirt. What the FUCK, dude? No more yoga for you.
9:16 – I had to rewind (I’m on the TiVo now) to find out who the Latino chick with no clothes on is. Paulina Rubio? That means less than nothing to me. Best Pop Female goes to Aguilera... no surprise probably, although I would have gone with Avril. Oh, look... Christina Aguilera is naked now... all is right with the world. She makes a lame Janet Jackson joke about her dress. Honey, it’s only cool to show skin if you can ACT cool about it.
9:24 – Who the FUCK dresses Sarah Jessica Parker??
9:25 - I count about 18 black people backing up Justin Timberlake, apparently trying to make him sound less white. A doomed mission, to be sure. Perhaps if we add a Hispanic guy playing the trumpet? Nope.
9:30 – Another Beatles tribute in which they drag out the widows. Yoko... you’ve been living in the US and London for like, 50 years. How the fuck can you still have a Japanese accent??
9:32 – Paul McCartney is such a wanker. Shut up, Paul... and put the guitar down.
9:40 – The Black Eyed Peas?? Whatever. Check out the string section. I want an electric cello shaped like a question mark. That’s cool. Is this what passes for “socially conscious hip-hop” during the off years between Wyclef Jean albums? Oh shit... is that Tittylake again? Get that white boy off the fucking stage for the umpteenth time.
9:45 – Yet another Perfunctory Lifetime Achievement Award (PLAA)... for pianist Van Cliburn... and yet another for Doc Watson. Nice how we devote a whole 45 seconds to each of those, huh? Female Country Vocal award? I’m pulling for Shania just so we’ll get see how slutted up she is, but of course the late June Carter Cash wins. Never mind that she sounds like my 80 year old uncles singing on that record, she’s dead, so she gets the award. Good enough.
9:53 – Cuba Gooding gives another PLAA to some old black lady who apparently sings children’s songs. Ok...?
9:54 – I couldn’t give a shit for R&B of any sort, but I will say this - Damn, Beyoncé is fine. Pretty bizarrely staged number... with the fake painting tableau and all. She really needs to stop yelling now.
9:59 – Sean Astin, Norah Jones, Two jazz PLAA’s, and the award for Best New Artist – Dave’s prediction, reluctantly is 50 Cent. The winner is? Evanescence. Really? Has anybody heard anything by them besides that Matrix song?? Whoa... 50 Cent just walked up on stage... what was that all about? He’s gonna pop a cap in their ass in the parking lot.
(continued...)
the grammy’s – hour one...
8:03 - I’ll say it... Prince fucking rocks. (Is that “Beyoncé”? I have to admit... I don’t really know) But really... why? Prince in 2004? I’m a little perplexed. Nice guitar playing, though. If Jimi Hendrix and Little Richard had a kid... it would be Prince.
8:06 – I must say... I’m too old to care, but here I am, watching this crap anyway. The TiVo is taping some kind of “Blue’s Clues” special, so I’m watching in REAL TIME on the bedroom TV. I may miss something.
8:08 РGwen Stefani confirms for me that it was, in fact, Beyonc̩. Meanwhile, when did Quentin Tarantino become black?
8:10 – Beyoncé just won... something. I wasn’t really paying attention. This isn’t going to be a very informative review at this rate, is it?
8:12 – Whoa. I think I hear the Beatles rolling over in their graves. Even the once who aren’t dead yet. Don’t hurt yourself, Dave Matthews! Even Sting is sucking. Bleah.
8:16 – Did he just say “Foo Fighters with Chick Corea??”
8:20 – Christina Aguilera. I thought this was some song I’ve never heard, but it’s just that same “I am beautiful, no matter what they say...” song... just a-capella with a choir. It’s nice how she’s perfected those irritating Celine Dion chest beating pantomime actions so we can see how, you know... like... emotional she is. Oh well... at least she’s dressed for a change.
8:26 – Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal. Nominees... Bon Jovi? The Eagles? Please do not let them win! Oh, good... No Doubt won. Wshew... somebody under the age of 40 voted this year. Dave Stewart wrote that song? The Eurythmics guy? What a hack. No wonder I never liked it.
8:28 – Beck! Say something weird, Beck!! Yes!!
8:29 – Oh boy I finally get to hear what all the fuss is about the White Stripes. Whoa... it started kinda lame, but now it sounds like Led Zeppelin on crack. That was fun!! Wow.
8:34 – Lifetime Achievement Award... who the hell are the Funk Brothers? Best Rap Album... who the fuck cares? Unless it’s Outkast. Yay... they win. Where are they? Everyone looks confused. Only one of them shows. Oh, yeah... 2 word acceptance speeches rock.
8:37 – Did he just say “Sting and Sean Paul”? Oh, fuck...
8:43 – Time to appease the “red states” with a country music performance. Time for me to go get some more Chinese food. (Orange Chicken...yummmm.)
8:47 – Another Lifetime Achievement Award for Carol King and somebody... They don’t dwell much on those, do they. Anyway, next up...Best Pop Vocal... more insane nominees... 2/5 of whom are dead... George Harrison?? Warren Zevon?? Michael Macdonald?? But who wins? Justin Tittylake... er, I mean TIMBER lake.
8:52 – Commercial note, L’oreal... is there ANYONE who finds Andi MacDowell attractive? Seriously. And that accent...
8:56 – Time for some kind of Luther Vandross tribute. Whatever. Look... it’s Patti LaBelle. Y’see... here’s the thing about the Janet Jackson fiasco... if you do the math, showing one whole Janet Jackson breast reveals FAR less breast surface area than just Patti LaBelle’s cleavage! Why is it only the nipple part which is offensive? Where do we humans come up with this crap??
9:00 – Oh God... it’s Celine Dion time. AAAH!!! The audio is dead. AAAAH Ha Ha Ha!!! Oh, she gets a new mike, but her monitor is still dead. Now the feedback starts! Oh... yes, yes, yes... that’ll teach you to come back and haunt us after you pretend to “retire” you fucking steaming pile of French Canadian Ego gone wild.
9:05 – They threaten us once again with the upcoming Sting and Sean Paul fiasco-in-waiting.
(continued...)
8:03 - I’ll say it... Prince fucking rocks. (Is that “Beyoncé”? I have to admit... I don’t really know) But really... why? Prince in 2004? I’m a little perplexed. Nice guitar playing, though. If Jimi Hendrix and Little Richard had a kid... it would be Prince.
8:06 – I must say... I’m too old to care, but here I am, watching this crap anyway. The TiVo is taping some kind of “Blue’s Clues” special, so I’m watching in REAL TIME on the bedroom TV. I may miss something.
8:08 РGwen Stefani confirms for me that it was, in fact, Beyonc̩. Meanwhile, when did Quentin Tarantino become black?
8:10 – Beyoncé just won... something. I wasn’t really paying attention. This isn’t going to be a very informative review at this rate, is it?
8:12 – Whoa. I think I hear the Beatles rolling over in their graves. Even the once who aren’t dead yet. Don’t hurt yourself, Dave Matthews! Even Sting is sucking. Bleah.
8:16 – Did he just say “Foo Fighters with Chick Corea??”
8:20 – Christina Aguilera. I thought this was some song I’ve never heard, but it’s just that same “I am beautiful, no matter what they say...” song... just a-capella with a choir. It’s nice how she’s perfected those irritating Celine Dion chest beating pantomime actions so we can see how, you know... like... emotional she is. Oh well... at least she’s dressed for a change.
8:26 – Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal. Nominees... Bon Jovi? The Eagles? Please do not let them win! Oh, good... No Doubt won. Wshew... somebody under the age of 40 voted this year. Dave Stewart wrote that song? The Eurythmics guy? What a hack. No wonder I never liked it.
8:28 – Beck! Say something weird, Beck!! Yes!!
8:29 – Oh boy I finally get to hear what all the fuss is about the White Stripes. Whoa... it started kinda lame, but now it sounds like Led Zeppelin on crack. That was fun!! Wow.
8:34 – Lifetime Achievement Award... who the hell are the Funk Brothers? Best Rap Album... who the fuck cares? Unless it’s Outkast. Yay... they win. Where are they? Everyone looks confused. Only one of them shows. Oh, yeah... 2 word acceptance speeches rock.
8:37 – Did he just say “Sting and Sean Paul”? Oh, fuck...
8:43 – Time to appease the “red states” with a country music performance. Time for me to go get some more Chinese food. (Orange Chicken...yummmm.)
8:47 – Another Lifetime Achievement Award for Carol King and somebody... They don’t dwell much on those, do they. Anyway, next up...Best Pop Vocal... more insane nominees... 2/5 of whom are dead... George Harrison?? Warren Zevon?? Michael Macdonald?? But who wins? Justin Tittylake... er, I mean TIMBER lake.
8:52 – Commercial note, L’oreal... is there ANYONE who finds Andi MacDowell attractive? Seriously. And that accent...
8:56 – Time for some kind of Luther Vandross tribute. Whatever. Look... it’s Patti LaBelle. Y’see... here’s the thing about the Janet Jackson fiasco... if you do the math, showing one whole Janet Jackson breast reveals FAR less breast surface area than just Patti LaBelle’s cleavage! Why is it only the nipple part which is offensive? Where do we humans come up with this crap??
9:00 – Oh God... it’s Celine Dion time. AAAH!!! The audio is dead. AAAAH Ha Ha Ha!!! Oh, she gets a new mike, but her monitor is still dead. Now the feedback starts! Oh... yes, yes, yes... that’ll teach you to come back and haunt us after you pretend to “retire” you fucking steaming pile of French Canadian Ego gone wild.
9:05 – They threaten us once again with the upcoming Sting and Sean Paul fiasco-in-waiting.
(continued...)
Saturday, February 7
"you need a good breakfast, that's a fact..."
Seven in the A.M... Saturday.... feeding the kids their breakfast (Quaker Oatmeal) while I eat Apple Jacks out of a FunPak-sized box... you know... those big variety boxes of cereal, which seem like a great idea until there's nothing but "Special K" and "Corn Flakes" left. And eating Apple Jacks is always greatly enhanced by the fact that they are invariably accompanied by a 20 year old commercial jingle inside of my head. Do they even advertise Apple Jacks anymore? Or are they going to coast along on the coupla million people they hooked back in the early 70's until we start dying off?
Anyway...
In other breakfast cereal news, yesterday we were all piled in the bed in the morning... Wife getting the kids their breakfast and ready for preschool... kids watching cartoons in our bed... me lying down trying to keep my eyes closed until the latest possible moment of the day, when my 1-year-old son apparently got bored with eating his Cheerios and decided that it would be more fun to lift up my shirt and find out how many Cheerios he could fit into my navel.
I love being the Dad.
Despite the positive response this little experiment got from the rest of the family, I did not allow it to continue.
D.
Seven in the A.M... Saturday.... feeding the kids their breakfast (Quaker Oatmeal) while I eat Apple Jacks out of a FunPak-sized box... you know... those big variety boxes of cereal, which seem like a great idea until there's nothing but "Special K" and "Corn Flakes" left. And eating Apple Jacks is always greatly enhanced by the fact that they are invariably accompanied by a 20 year old commercial jingle inside of my head. Do they even advertise Apple Jacks anymore? Or are they going to coast along on the coupla million people they hooked back in the early 70's until we start dying off?
Anyway...
In other breakfast cereal news, yesterday we were all piled in the bed in the morning... Wife getting the kids their breakfast and ready for preschool... kids watching cartoons in our bed... me lying down trying to keep my eyes closed until the latest possible moment of the day, when my 1-year-old son apparently got bored with eating his Cheerios and decided that it would be more fun to lift up my shirt and find out how many Cheerios he could fit into my navel.
I love being the Dad.
Despite the positive response this little experiment got from the rest of the family, I did not allow it to continue.
D.
Friday, February 6
h.o.m.e.s...
A quick glance at my "guest map" on the right over there reveals that my weblog is particularly popular with people in the Great Lakes region.
Who knew?
Anyway, this means that I probably have about the same chance as Howard Dean does of winning the upcoming Michigan Democratic primary.
"Dave for America!"
D.
A quick glance at my "guest map" on the right over there reveals that my weblog is particularly popular with people in the Great Lakes region.
Who knew?
Anyway, this means that I probably have about the same chance as Howard Dean does of winning the upcoming Michigan Democratic primary.
"Dave for America!"
D.
hey, jerky...
I’ve been buying bags of beef jerky to snack on while I’m on the train and in the office. I figure it’s better than the other stuff I snack on... cookies... candy bars... brownies... chips... you know... “CARBS!” Carbs are bad. Bad, bad, bad. Worse than bad. Ask anyone. Carbs are the new Saddam. Keebler, Nabisco, Frito-Lay.. Hostess... there’s your Axis of Evil.
Anyway... jerky has almost no carbs. But the real advantage of eating jerky is that is really only a vague approximation of “eating”. You chew a lot, and you taste a lot, and you may occasionally swallow, but the ratio of swallows to chews is so infinitesimally small that the rate of calorie consumption probably only just barely outpaces the rate of calories BURNED by virtue of all the chewing. But at the same time, it tricks that pesky little part of your brain into thinking you’ve eaten something.
Only problem... it does not always play nicely with my seriously gappy teeth.
Then there’s the “teriyaki breath”.
Other than that, it’s working out fairly nicely.
D.
I’ve been buying bags of beef jerky to snack on while I’m on the train and in the office. I figure it’s better than the other stuff I snack on... cookies... candy bars... brownies... chips... you know... “CARBS!” Carbs are bad. Bad, bad, bad. Worse than bad. Ask anyone. Carbs are the new Saddam. Keebler, Nabisco, Frito-Lay.. Hostess... there’s your Axis of Evil.
Anyway... jerky has almost no carbs. But the real advantage of eating jerky is that is really only a vague approximation of “eating”. You chew a lot, and you taste a lot, and you may occasionally swallow, but the ratio of swallows to chews is so infinitesimally small that the rate of calorie consumption probably only just barely outpaces the rate of calories BURNED by virtue of all the chewing. But at the same time, it tricks that pesky little part of your brain into thinking you’ve eaten something.
Only problem... it does not always play nicely with my seriously gappy teeth.
Then there’s the “teriyaki breath”.
Other than that, it’s working out fairly nicely.
D.
Thursday, February 5
the tiggler...
The following is an excerpt from an email exchange between my wife and I regarding the discovery of a most fascinating and peculiar device... the “tiggler.” It all started with Janet Jackson, her “wardrobe malfunction,” and her “pastie”...
I’m still not sure what kind of “idea” I’ve given her. I’m sure as shit not getting my tongue pierced. I'm hiding all the kooshballs, too.
D.
The following is an excerpt from an email exchange between my wife and I regarding the discovery of a most fascinating and peculiar device... the “tiggler.” It all started with Janet Jackson, her “wardrobe malfunction,” and her “pastie”...
J: It actually wasn’t a pastie. Thanks to the erudite, well-informed folks on my email list, I bring you a still photo as well as a sample of what it was.
D: I made the mistake of poking around the website you sent me with the nipple-thingies, and I made this somewhat disturbing discovery.
That has got to feel REAALY good for Person A, and REALLY fucking unpleasant for Person B!!
J: Umm, how does it vibrate? Is there a little tiny battery in there? Is that safe???
D: Yeah... I think if you look at the "bottom" of the post... the part that would be under your tongue - that's big enough for a watch battery. Is it safe? As long as the thing doesn't short and is fairly "watertight". No more dangerous than a hearing aid.
I'm just trying to imagine the simultaneous sensation of having 2 tiny Kooshballs in my mouth while my tongue is vibrating from the inside. I mean... nobody enjoys giving good oral sex more than I do, but... I think I'd have to draw the line there. Even if they made a "strap on" one... I can't imagine it wouldn't make you... I dunno... SNEEZE or something!
J: Oh really? NOBODY more than you? Hmmm...gives me ideas. Anyway... yeah, sneezing would not be good.
I’m still not sure what kind of “idea” I’ve given her. I’m sure as shit not getting my tongue pierced. I'm hiding all the kooshballs, too.
D.
brain... need... air...
I’d really like to be WORKING right now on the train, but I can’t because I can’t breathe, and I feel like my brain has no oxygen and I keep SIGHING and YAWNING just to get some AIR and I’m probably irritating everyone in a 10 foot radius on the train, but... FUCK! I need to get home and take a shot of Magic Nose Spray. I don’t care if I DO start bleeding from the nostrils either (Have you ever read the WARNING label on nasal decongestant spray? Scary shit) I’d take the risk just to have a few hours of AIR!
d.
I’d really like to be WORKING right now on the train, but I can’t because I can’t breathe, and I feel like my brain has no oxygen and I keep SIGHING and YAWNING just to get some AIR and I’m probably irritating everyone in a 10 foot radius on the train, but... FUCK! I need to get home and take a shot of Magic Nose Spray. I don’t care if I DO start bleeding from the nostrils either (Have you ever read the WARNING label on nasal decongestant spray? Scary shit) I’d take the risk just to have a few hours of AIR!
d.
Wednesday, February 4
pictures...
Have a look at my new photo site "streets and trains". I changed photo-hosting servers to one that works via email upload, so I can very quickly post snapshots I take with my tiny little camera every day. I wish I could also externally LINK to images so that I could place some inline in my blog. Maybe I'll figure out a way to do that eventually. Anyway... not much there yet... a few token snapshots from the commute, but I'll try to keep it busy.
d,
Have a look at my new photo site "streets and trains". I changed photo-hosting servers to one that works via email upload, so I can very quickly post snapshots I take with my tiny little camera every day. I wish I could also externally LINK to images so that I could place some inline in my blog. Maybe I'll figure out a way to do that eventually. Anyway... not much there yet... a few token snapshots from the commute, but I'll try to keep it busy.
d,
will you marry me, steve...?
Did people hear the news last week about Pixar and Disney. Apparently the distribution deal that Pixar and Disney have expires next year. The arrangement is something like – Disney gets a 50% cut plus a 15% distribution fee, or something like that. I probably have the details wrong. Well, Steve Jobs says to Disney – “Yeah, if we renew, you just get the 15% distribution fee, we get everything else.” To which Disney says, “Ummm... NO!” And to which Steve Jobs says... “Ok, then... we’ll start shopping around to another distributor.”
I have to say... I would fuck Steve Jobs right here and now.
Anybody that routinely gives the “Big Fuck You” to both Microsoft AND Disney... this guy just plain rocks.
You go, Steve.
D.
Did people hear the news last week about Pixar and Disney. Apparently the distribution deal that Pixar and Disney have expires next year. The arrangement is something like – Disney gets a 50% cut plus a 15% distribution fee, or something like that. I probably have the details wrong. Well, Steve Jobs says to Disney – “Yeah, if we renew, you just get the 15% distribution fee, we get everything else.” To which Disney says, “Ummm... NO!” And to which Steve Jobs says... “Ok, then... we’ll start shopping around to another distributor.”
I have to say... I would fuck Steve Jobs right here and now.
Anybody that routinely gives the “Big Fuck You” to both Microsoft AND Disney... this guy just plain rocks.
You go, Steve.
D.
the doc’s predictions....
So... lets’ see how my predictions for yesterday’s primaries hold up...
”Kerry will probably run away with 5 or 6 out of the seven...” (Kerry took five)
”Edwards might just maybe possibly win South Carolina and pick up a few second places...” He won SC and was second in OK and MO)
”I’m betting most states will run Kerry, Dean, Edwards.” (Dean didn’t pick up a single 2nd place)
”Lieberman might pick up 1 or 2 third places...” (He got a distant second in DE.)
”...but he’ll be in the single digits mostly...” ( Yup, everywhere but DE.)
”Wesley Clark, same deal.” (Nope. Clark wins OK, and gets second in AZ, NM, and ND)
Surprises? Mostly overestimating Dean and underestimating Clark. I was really surprised by Clark’s strong seconds in a couple of places... I didn’t think people were still taking him seriously... he puts his foot in his mouth even more than Dean does. But I guess I just don’t know much about the electorate in places like NM and ND. Maybe crazy generals are a big hit in states like that. But poor Howard Dean. I expected him to at least pull numbers like 18%-20% in a few states. He didn’t get more that 16% of the vote anywhere, and was down around 9%-10% most places. That’s only a stone’s throw away from the Kucinich Zone! Granted, Dean will be expected to do better in more liberal places like CA, NY, and WA, but not if people perceive him as dead in the water by the time those elections come around. Sigh...
Oh well... I think I’m going to give myself a score of 3.5 out of 5 on the predictions... that’s a solid “ C”. Not bad, but I probably shouldn’t quit my day-job for a career in punditry.
D.
So... lets’ see how my predictions for yesterday’s primaries hold up...
”Kerry will probably run away with 5 or 6 out of the seven...” (Kerry took five)
”Edwards might just maybe possibly win South Carolina and pick up a few second places...” He won SC and was second in OK and MO)
”I’m betting most states will run Kerry, Dean, Edwards.” (Dean didn’t pick up a single 2nd place)
”Lieberman might pick up 1 or 2 third places...” (He got a distant second in DE.)
”...but he’ll be in the single digits mostly...” ( Yup, everywhere but DE.)
”Wesley Clark, same deal.” (Nope. Clark wins OK, and gets second in AZ, NM, and ND)
Surprises? Mostly overestimating Dean and underestimating Clark. I was really surprised by Clark’s strong seconds in a couple of places... I didn’t think people were still taking him seriously... he puts his foot in his mouth even more than Dean does. But I guess I just don’t know much about the electorate in places like NM and ND. Maybe crazy generals are a big hit in states like that. But poor Howard Dean. I expected him to at least pull numbers like 18%-20% in a few states. He didn’t get more that 16% of the vote anywhere, and was down around 9%-10% most places. That’s only a stone’s throw away from the Kucinich Zone! Granted, Dean will be expected to do better in more liberal places like CA, NY, and WA, but not if people perceive him as dead in the water by the time those elections come around. Sigh...
Oh well... I think I’m going to give myself a score of 3.5 out of 5 on the predictions... that’s a solid “ C”. Not bad, but I probably shouldn’t quit my day-job for a career in punditry.
D.
Tuesday, February 3
tuesday morning...
I usually don’t “work” on Tuesdays, but I’m giving a guest-lecture on Einstein and Relativity for someone else’s class. So I have the rest of the day to do... whatever. Maybe I’ll go shopping, or head up to B&N. Maybe I’ll work on “My Play”. Ha.
I’m sick, by the way. Cold... flu... stuffy... fevery... crazy-bad-headache... too-many-drugs-wooziness... I was able to lubricate and medicate myself into borderline teaching effectiveness yesterday with massive quantities of Earl Grey tea, Advil, Sudafed, and Altoids. A veritable drug-cocktail. (I forgot my zinc and Echinacea, though!) Hopefully it’ll continue to work.
I’m going to try again to record my lecture today. I bought a voice recorder for my iPod . I tried to use it yesterday, but it just crashed the fuck out of thing. I couldn’t even get my iPod to turn on... none of the buttons were working. Not good. I think I got it working now. Once I get all the bugs worked out, I plan to record all of my lectures so that I can burn CD's for any students who miss class. Too cool, huh? Maybe I’ll make “bootleg” copies available for download!
I should do some real work now.
ha.
d.
I usually don’t “work” on Tuesdays, but I’m giving a guest-lecture on Einstein and Relativity for someone else’s class. So I have the rest of the day to do... whatever. Maybe I’ll go shopping, or head up to B&N. Maybe I’ll work on “My Play”. Ha.
I’m sick, by the way. Cold... flu... stuffy... fevery... crazy-bad-headache... too-many-drugs-wooziness... I was able to lubricate and medicate myself into borderline teaching effectiveness yesterday with massive quantities of Earl Grey tea, Advil, Sudafed, and Altoids. A veritable drug-cocktail. (I forgot my zinc and Echinacea, though!) Hopefully it’ll continue to work.
I’m going to try again to record my lecture today. I bought a voice recorder for my iPod . I tried to use it yesterday, but it just crashed the fuck out of thing. I couldn’t even get my iPod to turn on... none of the buttons were working. Not good. I think I got it working now. Once I get all the bugs worked out, I plan to record all of my lectures so that I can burn CD's for any students who miss class. Too cool, huh? Maybe I’ll make “bootleg” copies available for download!
I should do some real work now.
ha.
d.
elections and stuff...
Well... today is another one of those primary days... not here in NY, but out there in a bunch of states... what is it – seven? It’ll be interesting to see if anything interesting happens, but somehow I doubt it. Kerry will probably run away with 5 or 6 out of the seven, Edwards might just maybe possibly win South Carolina and pick up a few second places, but I’m betting most states will run Kerry, Dean, Edwards. Lieberman might pick up 1 or 2 third places, but he’ll be in the single digits mostly. Wesley Clark, same deal. I’m predicting no surprises.
Too bad... poor Howard Dean. He’s the only guy in the race I was really “excited” about. This John Kerry guy... I dunno. I don’t think I have any major disagreements with any of his policies or anything, but whenever this guy speaks, all I can hear in my head is Charlie Brown’s teacher’s voice...”Mwaa-Wha, mmm-wa whaaa-whaa-whaaa.” And people said Al Gore was boring? I don’t see this guy getting anybody riled up... he seems to be winning because he’s “safe” and moderate and centrist and people think he can beat Bush. I’m not so sure. Too many people are actually swayed by Dubya’s aw-shucks-down-home-regular-guy schtick, I don’t see middle America coming out in big numbers for some dour-looking stiff from Massachusetts.
He sure is tall, though. And gaunt. I think he should just grow a beard and start wearing a top hat and go for the full Abe Lincoln look. Presidential? I’ll show you “Presidential”!
If not Dean, I think I’d be more apt to go with Edwards. Younger... more attractive... more Southern... more aw-shucks. But “aw shucks” in an intelligent, Clintonesque fashion... not in Bush’s Jethro-cum-Goober way. When Edwards speaks, he sounds like the real deal. When I watched him in one of the debates, he was the only one who sounded like he was talking... not reciting pre-recorded loops from his stump speech when you pull his string like some kind of Democratic See-and-Say. "This is my tax plan... GOBBLE-GOBBLE-GOBBLE-GOBBLE!"
Anyway... I think he’s got a tiny chance to move to the front if he wins SC and picks up 3 or 4 strong second places. Then all the news shows will be talking about him, since Kerry’s wins and Dean’s losses will be no surprises, and Edwards “strong showing” will become the interest story. That could give him some momentum going into the next set of states.
Jesus... what is this, CNBC? I don’t know what’s come over me that suddenly I’m subjecting you all to detailed analysis of the Democratic primaries. Please forgive me!
D.
Well... today is another one of those primary days... not here in NY, but out there in a bunch of states... what is it – seven? It’ll be interesting to see if anything interesting happens, but somehow I doubt it. Kerry will probably run away with 5 or 6 out of the seven, Edwards might just maybe possibly win South Carolina and pick up a few second places, but I’m betting most states will run Kerry, Dean, Edwards. Lieberman might pick up 1 or 2 third places, but he’ll be in the single digits mostly. Wesley Clark, same deal. I’m predicting no surprises.
Too bad... poor Howard Dean. He’s the only guy in the race I was really “excited” about. This John Kerry guy... I dunno. I don’t think I have any major disagreements with any of his policies or anything, but whenever this guy speaks, all I can hear in my head is Charlie Brown’s teacher’s voice...”Mwaa-Wha, mmm-wa whaaa-whaa-whaaa.” And people said Al Gore was boring? I don’t see this guy getting anybody riled up... he seems to be winning because he’s “safe” and moderate and centrist and people think he can beat Bush. I’m not so sure. Too many people are actually swayed by Dubya’s aw-shucks-down-home-regular-guy schtick, I don’t see middle America coming out in big numbers for some dour-looking stiff from Massachusetts.
He sure is tall, though. And gaunt. I think he should just grow a beard and start wearing a top hat and go for the full Abe Lincoln look. Presidential? I’ll show you “Presidential”!
If not Dean, I think I’d be more apt to go with Edwards. Younger... more attractive... more Southern... more aw-shucks. But “aw shucks” in an intelligent, Clintonesque fashion... not in Bush’s Jethro-cum-Goober way. When Edwards speaks, he sounds like the real deal. When I watched him in one of the debates, he was the only one who sounded like he was talking... not reciting pre-recorded loops from his stump speech when you pull his string like some kind of Democratic See-and-Say. "This is my tax plan... GOBBLE-GOBBLE-GOBBLE-GOBBLE!"
Anyway... I think he’s got a tiny chance to move to the front if he wins SC and picks up 3 or 4 strong second places. Then all the news shows will be talking about him, since Kerry’s wins and Dean’s losses will be no surprises, and Edwards “strong showing” will become the interest story. That could give him some momentum going into the next set of states.
Jesus... what is this, CNBC? I don’t know what’s come over me that suddenly I’m subjecting you all to detailed analysis of the Democratic primaries. Please forgive me!
D.
Monday, February 2
you can’t make up “news” like this, folks...
To tell you the truth, I had already forgotten about it by the time I posted my comment on the Super Bowl last night, but apparently I was supposed to be shocked or something. Here is the first AP wire headline that greeted me when I fired up my favorite online news site this morning...
The Doctor would like to interrupt the story hear to ask... “huh?” Unclear whether it was intentional? Yeah... because I’m sure Janet Jackson always wears pasties under her clothing, just in case her breast were to get “unexpectedly” exposed. And because when your breast DOES get unexpectedly exposed, the thing to do is look down in shock and use your hands to quickly cover your stomach. Come on people. That breast exposure was as clearly calculated and choreographed as the recent “shocking” tongue-wrestling match between Madonna and Britney. Have some fucking balls CBS.
Sorry... the story continues...
Yeah.... while we’re at it, who is gonna apologize for Puff Daddy, Nelly and Kid Rock?? Does the amount that they all sucked conform to CBS’s broadcast standards? Oh wait... it’s CBS... maybe it does...
In conclusion...
Yeah... RIGHT! Because I’m sitting here on the train, writing in my weblog about Janet Jackson’s breast, and listening to not one ,but TWO separate conversations about Janet Jackson’s breast. Such unwanted attention! Such a bad thing for a TV network! Shame! Shame on you MTV for embarrassing CBS so!
Please.
And am I mistaken, or didn’t Lil’ Kim (or one of those hip-hop diva chix) spend and entire Grammy ceremony wearing nothing but a pastie on one breast a few years ago? Has not the Nipple Taboo already been broken? Are people still really this easily shocked? Have people nothing better to fret over?
Is it just me who doesn’t care?
Dr. D.
To tell you the truth, I had already forgotten about it by the time I posted my comment on the Super Bowl last night, but apparently I was supposed to be shocked or something. Here is the first AP wire headline that greeted me when I fired up my favorite online news site this morning...
CBS apologizes for exposure of Janet Jackson's breast
Feb. 1, 2004 | NEW YORK (AP) -- CBS apologized on Sunday for an unexpectedly R-rated end to its Super Bowl halftime show, when singer Justin Timberlake tore off part of Janet Jackson's top, exposing her breast.
"CBS deeply regrets the incident," spokeswoman Leslie Anne Wade said after the network received several calls about the show.
The two singers were performing a flirtatious duet to end the halftime show, and at the song's finish, Timberlake reached across Jackson's leather gladiator outfit and pulled off the covering to her right breast.
The network quickly cut away from the shot, and did not mention the incident on the air.
It was unclear whether Timberlake intended to expose Jackson's breast.
The Doctor would like to interrupt the story hear to ask... “huh?” Unclear whether it was intentional? Yeah... because I’m sure Janet Jackson always wears pasties under her clothing, just in case her breast were to get “unexpectedly” exposed. And because when your breast DOES get unexpectedly exposed, the thing to do is look down in shock and use your hands to quickly cover your stomach. Come on people. That breast exposure was as clearly calculated and choreographed as the recent “shocking” tongue-wrestling match between Madonna and Britney. Have some fucking balls CBS.
Sorry... the story continues...
Wade said CBS officials attended rehearsals of the halftime show all week, "and there was no indication any such thing would happen. The moment did not conform to CBS' broadcast standards and we would like to apologize to anyone who was offended."
The Super Bowl halftime show, which also featured Puff Daddy, Nelly and Kid Rock, was produced by MTV, CBS' corporate cousin in Viacom.
Yeah.... while we’re at it, who is gonna apologize for Puff Daddy, Nelly and Kid Rock?? Does the amount that they all sucked conform to CBS’s broadcast standards? Oh wait... it’s CBS... maybe it does...
In conclusion...
"We were extremely disappointed by elements of the MTV-produced halftime show," Joe Browne, NFL executive vice president, said. "They were totally inconsistent with assurances our office was given about the content of the show.
"It's unlikely that MTV will produce another Super Bowl halftime."
Yeah... RIGHT! Because I’m sitting here on the train, writing in my weblog about Janet Jackson’s breast, and listening to not one ,but TWO separate conversations about Janet Jackson’s breast. Such unwanted attention! Such a bad thing for a TV network! Shame! Shame on you MTV for embarrassing CBS so!
Please.
And am I mistaken, or didn’t Lil’ Kim (or one of those hip-hop diva chix) spend and entire Grammy ceremony wearing nothing but a pastie on one breast a few years ago? Has not the Nipple Taboo already been broken? Are people still really this easily shocked? Have people nothing better to fret over?
Is it just me who doesn’t care?
Dr. D.
Sunday, February 1
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